The Airing Of Grievances

FDL has a late night post up regarding Festivus and the "Airing Of Grievances". I will state that I never watched Seinfeld, but I really like this idea, might make it a holiday tradition.

Here are a few of mine.


The Bastard's Brother:

You still have to work on that whole delivery thing, man. I know you're almost always right (except when you disagree with me), but you credit people in general with having a thicker hide than they really have. Go easy. Also, that whole thing where your drinking habit paid off with the coolest job ever. Fuck that, so not fair. You're still too generous, and you enjoy life way more than a body should be allowed. Gotta few things to learn about treating women, too. Hurry up and figure that out.

The Bastard's Mother:

You really need to let go of that whole "Jesus" thing. I think you know it's time, I think you've been questioning things for a while, but oh, how you fear change! I'm pretty sure Jesus didn't hate faggots, or love killing brown people for profit (remember the money changers?), so if you do have to believe, at least read the damn book once in a while. You need to be more appreciated for raising Rissy. You don't get enough credit where it's due, and you are to unassuming to demand it. Work on that.

Toshi's Mother:

You are a beautiful human being that needs to slow down and enjoy life a bit. Stop letting boys treat you like shit, you're better than that. Remember that this is only a ride (a la Bill Hicks), not a race. And that whole generosity thing. You're cutting in on my schtick here, love. Allow a fellow his vices, all right?

I think I'm gonna keep doing this as a small series over the next few days.

Much love, and many blessings